In my last post, Holiday Stress, I explained why the “most wonderful time of the year” is often the most stressed-out time of the year too.  And I shared eight common causes of holiday stress, including: work, busyness, family relationships, travel, Christmas shopping & gift giving, food & drink, expectations, and money.

Today I want to give you some ways of coping with holiday stress, and even eliminating it, so you can enjoy stress-free holidays.

7 Tips for a Stress-Free Holiday

1. Plan ahead – You can enjoy margin in your life, and a healthy work-life balance, even when you add extra holiday events or extra work hours to the mix.  But you need to plan ahead and book things into your calendar as early as possible.  Often, the stress doesn’t come so much from the extra events, but because we haven’t adequately planned or accommodated for them in our schedule.
2. Set a budget – Guilt-free and stress-free shopping can be yours if you set a budget in advance.  Oh, and if you stick with it! [Read more…]

Christmas is supposed to be “the most wonderful time of the year,” as Andy Williams famously sang, and the “hap-happiest season of all.”  But for many, the Christmas holiday is also the most stressed-out time of the year.  So what can we do to reduce, and even eliminate, holiday stress from our lives this Christmas?

I think the first step is to identify what holiday stress is, and where it comes from. And for each person, it’s different.

What are the causes of holiday stress?

Work – For some, holiday stress comes from their job, especially if they work in a business that gets a lot busier during the holidays.  The hectic pace, and harried customers, can cause them to lose some of the joy and meaning of the season.  Some feel stress because they can’t get time off during the holidays to get together with family and friends, while others volunteer for stress because they want to work as many extra hours as they can so they’ll have more money to spend on Christmas gifts. Others are terrified at the thought of getting together with co-workers for a company Christmas party.  They can’t stand their co-workers or boss in the 9-5, so why would they want to hang out with them for a holiday party?

Busyness – If it is not their business that adds stress and pressure in their lives, it could be the busyness of their schedule.  All the special school, social club and church events and parties can fill our calendars fairly quickly.  And sometimes, more than one event is scheduled for the same day or time, forcing us to choose one over the other, or add more stress by trying to attend them both. [Read more…]

A few weeks ago, I shared my ideas on how I planned to enjoy holiday food without the weight gain this year. I mentioned that in the past I have frequently gained a few pounds during the holidays due to all the special meals, desserts, parties, etc.

Well, yesterday was Thanksgiving Day in America, the unofficial start of the Christmas eating (and shopping) season. Here’s an update on how I’m doing so far . . .

Earlier in the week I prepared myself by making trade-offs in my diet by eating less (and better) food during regular meals.  Knowing this might not be enough to counter-act the extra calories I’d be eating during Thanksgiving weekend, I also increased the frequency and intensity of my exercise routines, with the hopes of speeding up my metabolism. I typically work out at the YMCA in the mornings, but this week I’ve added additional workouts at home in the evenings, using the Jillian Michaels – 30 Day Shred DVD (Jillian is one of the trainers on the hit TV show The Biggest Loser).

As for the big Thanksgiving meal itself, I filled my plate with a small serving of each of the items I cared about.  Gratefully, I didn’t pig-out or stuff myself. And for dessert, I enjoyed smaller slivers of each pie, instead of having larger pieces.

So that’s how I’m doing so far.  There are still lots of holiday meals and events coming up, but I’m planning on continuing my extra exercise routines throughout the holidays.

How’d you do?

You might also like:
How to Survive the Holidays and Maintain Balance
How to Beat Holiday Stress and Busyness
13 Ways to Save Money & Beat the Stress of Holiday Shopping & Gift Giving
How to Change Expectations During the Holidays or Anytime
How to Cope with Holiday Stress

The following is a guest post from Stephen Thomas at Life Change For You!, as part of my series on How to Survive the Holidays & Maintain Balance.

During the holidays there can be a lot of stress and I would like to address one very important kind and my solution to it. Coping with holiday stress can take the fun out of family gatherings and worse, create tension in relationships.

During the holiday season, there are gatherings for celebrations and sharing of meals. We fill the house to overflowing with people that we see often and those we do not. We also fill the house with people we get along with and those we don’t, or at least not so well. This is the process I have used in the past. Now I will admit that I have not always remembered to use this technique and those times, unfortunately, did not go as well as the times I have.

Okay, enough build up. Here is the technique. I love to watch people. When my wife and I go to the mall, she shops and I watch people. I like to sit on one of those benches and watch people walk by. As I watch, I ask myself questions about them. Why do they dress that way? Who are they and what makes them tick? What kind of hardship has life thrown at them and how did that mold who they are? If given the chance, how would they change their life?

When I am in a holiday family gathering, I try to do the same thing. I get myself into the mall mode and watch people. I look at them and their life without judgment. I ask myself the same types of questions. Who are they really and what is their life like? What is it they are trying to say with their words and their actions?

This allows me to let Aunt Mable’s comment about my favorite sweater go and realize that she is just a bitter woman who needs to cut down others so she doesn’t feel so worthless herself. I can watch my niece’s son stick his snot covered fingers directly into the jello bowl and feel her embarrassment, instead of wanting to strangle the little devil.

You may think that this technique is impersonal and that I am being unloving. I fell nothing of the sort! Using this way of looking at people helps me to see past their faults and learn to love them as they are and for who they are. Granted, my mental images and reasons for what they do or say may be far from the truth, their truth, but it helps me to see them as people. We so often label others and forget that they are human just like us and they are trying to live life as best they can, just like us.

You may not like this mall mode of thinking to cope with holiday stress, but for me, it works much better than getting into a huge fight or getting so inebriated that nothing bothers me. Whatever your method of coping with holiday stress, may you have a very blessed holiday season.

You might also like…
How to Survive the Holidays and Maintain Balance
How to Beat Holiday Stress and Busyness
How to Enjoy Holiday Food Without the Weight Gain
13 Ways to Save Money & Beat the Stress of Holiday Shopping & Gift Giving
How to Change Expectations During the Holidays or Anytime

“We’re going to have to cut back on Christmas this year.”

I heard that statement several times when I was growing up.  One instance I vividly remember is when my dad was out of work due to a strike at his factory.  I think I was maybe 10 or 11 years old.  Christmas was a bit slim that year.  And yet, somehow I survived!

Sadly, as an adult, I’ve known more than a few people who, even when times are tough, insist on giving their kids a “good Christmas,” whatever that means.  For them, it means spending as much (or maybe even more) on gifts for their kids this year as they would have in “good” years.

Maybe they thought it was important to do that so their kids wouldn’t feel deprived.  But what  happened?  They might have a nice Christmas morning, but then they don’t have the money to pay the rent or mortgage on January 1st, or they get that big credit card bill in the mail and have no way to pay it off.  Then, instead of Christmas joy, they’re faced with fear and stress.

I didn’t think much of it when I was a kid, but as an adult, I realized that my parents gave me an extra gift that year.  They changed my expectations.  And I believe that helped us all to have a “good” Christmas.

Because they told me that times were tight and that they couldn’t afford to buy many gifts that year, I was able to adjust my expectations, and also my wants and desires.  Instead of having a Christmas list with 20 big things on it, I narrowed it down to just a few inexpensive things that I would really appreciate and enjoy the most.

I also learned a real-life lesson:  sometimes, we have to make changes and choices.  I learned that I could participate in my family’s long-term financial success by being OK with simple gifts.

I’m writing about this as part of my “How to Survive the Holidays” series, but the principle works any time of the year  Whenever you want to make change in your life, you need to change both your expectations, and the expecations of all those who will be impacted.

Whether it is a decision to go back to school, get a second job, cut back on entertainment expenses, ask the kids to help out more, change your job to something more meaningful, changes need to be made.  It can’t be “business as usual” anymore.

So how do you help people change their expectations?

• First, it is important thing you need to do is help them see the big picture – the long-term goal or reason you’re making the change.
• Second, help them see how they can help contribute positively to the change – how they can make a difference.
• Third, plan some kind of reward or way to celebrate once the goal has been achieved.

For some people, kids especially, it can be hard to accept that things need to change or be different.  But I think you’ll improve your chances of success by following these simple steps.  If you have any other ideas, or comments, please be sure to share them below.

You might also like…
How to Survive the Holidays and Maintain Balance
How to Beat Holiday Stress and Busyness
How to Enjoy Holiday Food Without the Weight Gain
13 Ways to Save Money & Beat the Stress of Holiday Shopping & Gift Giving